My story is one of how not to get a prenup. My husband had investments he wanted to protect in a prenup. I was fine with that idea. My attitude at the time was, "We're both on board with doing this thing. Lots of people have done it before. I'm sure the professionals will show us what to do." Simple as that. Only it wasn't. Everything we learned about the scope and types of terms you can have in a prenup came after receiving the first draft my husband's attorney had created. This set off an unnecessarily contentious back and forth between our attorneys and a surplus of billable hours for both of them.

What I've learned since then is that our experience is relatively common. I've received numerous calls from distressed individuals who have just received a first draft from their fiancé's attorney. The drafting attorney likely created the most protective prenup possible under the law. This often means going much further than protecting what each partner is bringing to the marriage, and extends to protecting future assets without a proper discussion first.

Despite the stress, my husband and I ended up with a prenuptial agreement we both truly agreed on and felt good about. Let me tell you: Having an agreement that takes both partners into consideration is so valuable for a marriage. And the bonus: The process and the prenup itself started us off with full transparency, a common language around our money, and clarity around what money was shared or not.